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Or what we like to hear about our wizardry.
I have a friend who has the uncanny ability to bring a houseplant back from the pits of despair just by looking at it. And another friend who can spend hours (literal hours at a time) manually removing every single thrip and aphid from her plants with a qtip.
This list of compliments for plant people was born out of a deep admiration for their dedication.
This is the why of the story.
The how involves me spending a couple of insomniac nights trying to fall asleep while listing all the compliments in a loop in my brain. Then recording voice notes. Then finally putting it down on paper. Oh, the life of an overthinker.
Here’s a sometimes tongue-in-cheek, sometimes as-serious-as-a-squirrel’s-cheeks list of compliments for the plant people in your life.
1. I like the way you talk to your plants. It makes me feel as if someone could talk to me like that one day.
2. Remember that time when your caladium croaked? Oh, how you handled that like a pro!
3. Whenever you enter a room, the peace lilies can feel your presence and they stop slouching.
4. Thank you for weaning me off my spritzing houseplants habit.
5. You’re so humble and not afraid to admit to your mistakes. (Such as taking in a Boston fern. Was that guy drama or what?)
6. Your plant care routines are better than my self-care routines. How do you do it?
7. You’re so open-minded, you’d even give a fussy fiddle-leaf fig a chance.
8. I admire your talent for reviving supermarket zombie plants.
9. I’m inspired by your skill of not letting your air plant get as crispy as a sour apple.
10. I admire your ability to set boundaries around people who say they kill their houseplants.
11. No one else could balance the watercare routine of 40 different plants as well as you do.
12. I admire how you trust your intuition when it comes to needy plants.
13. I appreciate your honesty about how demanding that alocasia was.
14. You’re adventurous and don’t shy away from trying new things. You even gave growing in LECA a try. What an adventure that was!
15. You’re so trustworthy. You’re the only person I would pay to plantsit for me.
16. I admire your patience in dealing with fungus gnats. I wish I had the same level of patience when dealing with fungus people.
17. I remember that time when you talked me out of overspending on that overpriced variegated monstera. Thank you for looking out for me!
18. You’re a true friend. You don’t let me add banana peels to my plant pot like an idiot.
19. Your joke about calathea bringing all the mealybugs to the yard made me spit out my oat milk.
20. You’re the best companion someone could ask for when plant-spying through other people’s windows.
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